#weneedoneanother | nat’l adoption month detour


So…I’m taking a little detour in this “adoption series.” Hang on for the ride! It could be fun, it could be helpful, it could feel exposing, it could be just what you need. I mean, just what WE need.

In my “adoption world,” there are quite a few places and people asking the adopted person to write for them – because they’re eager and open to learn, because they’re realizing that the adopted person’s voice has been quiet or even silenced or even missing, because they’re learning to “lean in and listen.” I’m SO grateful for that. It’s a gift to both the “host” and the writer.

As November (AKA National Adoption Month) was approaching, I had this idea, this thought: “What if I invited the adoptive parent to write for me, the adopted person? Maybe it could be encouraging (to the adopted person and to other adoptive families and even those who aren’t closely connected to adoption) to hear stories of awareness and insight and surprise and honesty and healing – of transformation – from adoptive parents. Maybe in order for ALL of us to keep moving forward, we need to listen, collectively, to one another, together. We adoptees are asking adoptive parents to listen to us, but I wonder how well we are listening to them? Giving them voice?”

(SIDE NOTE to adoptive parents: I can only imagine that it’s been easy to feel hurt or guilt, maybe even shame, from things adoptees have said or done to and about the adoption world, but specifically to and about adoptive parents. I’m so sorry for the ways you’ve been hurt, misunderstood, pushed away by criticism or sarcasm or anger or ignorance or defensiveness. That is NOT helpful, kind or respectful. Thank you…for your grace.)

So, a few weeks ago I shot this out on Facebook, asking adoptive parents to write for me, to write…

a post about YOUR awareness and understanding and transformation, etc. because you’re realizing how much the adoption process is a 2-way street. because you’re realizing that there is both brokenness and beauty. because you’re realizing what it means to “listen.” this is NOT really about “how your child came to you” kind of post, but more about how YOU are finding more of YOU, more of your child, more of Jesus, in the adoption process.

And I’m so glad they did. I’ve so enjoyed reading each one. I’ve needed to read these. My heart needed to read these. And I want to share them with you.

I hope that as you read these stories over the next few weeks, you’ll feel enlightened and encouraged, but even more so, connected to more of the heart of the adoptive parent. Thank you to everyone who submitted a post. Your voice is a gift…to ALL of us.

So get ready…



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